of monkeys, mending broken friendships and deepest condolences

fyi oh just great i woke up to my mother's screamings that a monkey entered the house and threw our plastic apple out of anger. interesting no?

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the greatest conversations always happened in the car. i have had numerous of great conversations that i could replay time and time again in a car. today i talked to her. its so good to be able to open up to her. actually we were not 'talking'. we were shouting all our thoughts out. it feels so good to let it all out. its good to yell all these stuff that have been on my mind. i hate to keep things bottled up inside me. thats what you get when you put a person who is the exact replica of madeline and madeline herself trying to sort things out. to bare it all to the world. we were expressing ourselves with so much hand gestures and words...in english, hokkien, mandarin, bahasa malaysia. arms were flying. words were everywhere. yet it felt so good to let it flow. we were angry, frustrated, and disappointed at how things are now. we feel like over-turning tables and throwing chairs. but then again, there is the whole EGO issue. like its very hard to bring ourselves to shallow our pride and ego and make the first move to try to mend things now. (ego is bitter and fattening kays?) and there's the whole we-are-girls issue!


so now how should we solve this puzzle? how do we entangle this web of lies, confusion and misunderstandings that have been spun to keep things better but just backfired because anyone can see that its a no-brainer to lie and all the misunderstandings due to pride and feelings again?


cant things just go back to the way they are? i do not believe in fate when it comes to love and friendship. okays, i believe that chance and fate plays a minor role to spark things off but the rest is up to us to cultivate. friendship is a two-way process. dude i need your co-operation here. cant we just talk things through? im tired of all this acting. we need to sit and talk. four of us. period.



i need more ideas and suggestions on how to save a friendship. i refuse to give up on us just yet.


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and my deepest condolences to you, my dear friend.
im sorry that you've lost her.
its never easy to lose anyone but its the hardest to lose them when nobody see it coming.
she has gone to a better place.
and will be a guardian angel and forever watch over you and your family from above.
her time has come,
she had went up first and will be waiting in the heavens.
im here for you if you ever need anything.
im just a phone call away.
we are all here.
i'll keep you and your family in my prayers tonight.

why is the world such an evil place?
how dare those people just stab without conscious?
can you sleep if you've killed someone?
you've taken away not only a person's life,
but she is also a mother,
a wife,
a daughter,
a friend,
an aunt,
an employer,
a contributer to the society,
a person who can make a difference in this world in her very own way.

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*praying for the world to be a better place*
and for God to watch over all the people that i care about.